Welcome to the Jungle!

Most people don’t understand why I am so intense about my calling. I mean it’s only Italy right, how bad can it be? You get to sip cappuccino and admire the wonderful architecture. It’s not like you are going to the jungle or anything. Well, I wonder if demons prefer to gather more in jungles of leaves or jungles of people and ideas. I would think they would congregate at the intersection of human contemplation, endeavoring to influence people’s thoughts and steal their hearts from God.

Nevertheless, anything we do with God to help snatch people out of hell is risky. It doesn’t matter how beautiful the back drop scenery is when you are focused on the broken condition of human hearts. The work of God will always be intense and dramatic. After all, we are dealing with life and death. Maybe it’s easy for us to not take the words of Ephesians 6 seriously because we are not posing that much of a threat to hell. Ephesians 6:12 (NIV) says, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

C.T. Studd, English missionary to China and the Congo in the later 19^th and early 20^th century nailed it when he said, “Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop, within a yard of hell.” He lived with an intensity that most of us cannot even fathom. We want to say, “hey, dude tone it down a bit. Don’t you think you are taking yourself and this whole Christian thing a little too seriously?” But Studd didn’t let up. His desire was to please God so much that he made himself a threat to hell. He said too, “I want to live in such a way that when I die, all of hell rejoices that I am no longer in the fight.”

No one else’s words seem to capture the seriousness and intensity which God has called me forward. So I say to all who will go bravely out into their spheres of influence with the cause of Jesus written on their hearts and boldly spoken from their lips, “Welcome to the jungle!”

Jesus is number F-O-U-R (4)?!

In a recent poll Italians were asked to whom they addressed prayer. Jesus was the # F-O-U-R (4)person on the list - (Jesus is Number 4 video)! It's for this reason that our hearts are committed now more than ever before to get to Italy to live out and teach the saving gospel of Jesus Christ! No matter what it takes to get there and get the work done, we will do it! No matter if anyone else follows us or believes we can do it, we HAVE to go, and WANT to go because God said to do it! He called us to wake up Italy and that's what we intend to do!

Because of what we've learned in the process of getting ready for our calling, we are not afraid of what can happen to us. We are living on the edge of our faith with our kids right there in the mix, and are having the time of our lives watching God work His plan out for us. Like Las Vegas gamblers, we have shoved in all our chips on Jesus, and bet everything that the call He spoke to us is true and is coming to pass even right now.

We have never stopped working to see the reality of waking up Italy to the truth of Jesus happen. Our colleagues are working, evangelizing and discipling and planting new churches. Our ministry partners are helping with their financial gifts and prayers each month. And we are finishing out with fundraising and school (graduating in October). We look forward to joining in the church planting work in Italy soon

Just to let you know where we are right now - I wanted to let you know that to date we have raised 63% of our monthly support budget. We have been increasing every month, and now only need just over $500 in monthly support to reach 70% of our support goal. At this point, we will be able to enter the last phase of our preparation - applying for our religious worker's visas for entrance into Italy!

We will be coming to Atlanta during the week of March Monday, March 25 - Friday, March 29 to meet with local pastors about joining our support team. We already have meetings scheduled, but if you have been praying about becoming a partner in waking up Italy to Jesus, now would be the time to contact us to set up a meeting - stephen@wakeupitaly.org. We would love to schedule a lunch or coffee meeting and tell you how you can be a part of a dynamic explosion of the gospel into the hearts and lives of those living in Italy! It's time to wake up Italy! Will you be a part of making Jesus # 1 again in the hearts of Italians?!

 

 

Transformation is More Important Than Transportation

I've always been somewhat of a perfectionist and people pleaser. I like to have people pleased with me, so I sometimes will push myself beyond normal human limits in order to impress others. This has sometimes caused me to make poor choices personally, and inflict wounds to my own soul and others, too.

Lately, though I have felt God speaking to me as we prepare to go work in Italy that this mode of operation simply cannot be carried over if I am to be successful. The journey to our ministry destination has sometimes taken surprising turns, such as being in graduate school at Wheaton College. I always thought I'd come back to school after we spent a few years in ministry, but God had a different plan.

In preparation for a class on leadership, I recently read a book called Strengthening the Soul of Your Own Leadership by Ruth Haley Barton. Of all the books I have read thus far in graduate school, this book has found its way not only into my head, but into my heart. God has used it to awaken in me a reconnection to his Spirit, reevaluation of my priorities, and a deep conviction that I need to rest more in God and stop striving so much to be all things to all people.

I came to a place where I was pouring out everything I had for everyone else, but not really spending the time alone with God so my own soul could be refreshed. That may sound selfish at first, but if I don't have a connection with God that is personal and meaningful, how in the world can I lead others to experience God in that way, too?

No other statement in a book has impacted me more than what I am about to share with you now. It articulates exactly where I am right now in my calling to Italy. I pray that God will use this quote to strengthen you to stay true to him and the calling he has placed on your life, too.

"The transformation that is happening in us is more important that getting where we think we need to go." I've been so enamored with just getting to Italy to minister that I sometimes get agitated with why it has taken so long to get there. Sometimes I forget that for God to work through me to others he has to first work in me.

Right now I am at a place where I am simply trying to focus on staying faithful to Jesus, pay attention to everything he is trying to teach me, and then move forward when he is ready for me to do so. "As we stay faithful to the journey into the center of our being where God dwells, we are freed from our bondage to the expectation of others and our own inner compulsions, we are less and less mesmerized by human voices, less and less manipulated by the expectation of others and more and more given over to God." Now that we are several years into this journey, I feel God renewing the vision inside me to get to Italy and plant churches, but minus the need to please others and live up to their expectations, either real or imagined.

Lastly, I am finding that, "In our encounters with God we die not only to the expectations of others but also to ourselves - our addictions to performing, to looking good and being perfect, to attaining more status than is good for us." In this journey God has revealed much in my heart, and is transforming me from the inside out. Yes, I am on fire more than ever to get to Italy and begin our work, but I want to do it with my full heart engaged, not damaged. I'll be no good to anyone, if I don't take the time to let God heal my own heart and strengthen me form the inside out.

When I consider all that God has done in us over the last few months, I believe we are now closer than ever to taking the next step in our journey. Italy is not that far from where we are.

If God called you to Italy how'd you end up in Illinois?

 

 

EMPTY CHURCHES, BROKEN HEARTS

 

Sitting here tonight contemplating my future. Knowing where God has called me from, and where he's called me to, but somehow feeling blocked from going forward. Yes, God called my family to plant churches in Italy. It's a calling that does not seem to be necessary or even legitimate sometimes. So if God called me to Italy, how did I end up in Illinois? Well stick around and find out.

First I have to back track and tell you there are so many stereotypes about Italy. The things that first come to mind is it's a nice place for vacation, great wine, great food, beautiful landscapes, beautiful art and architecture, wonderful engineering feats, and fast cars. This Italy does not compute with a call to missions and church planting there. I am sure most people think like I did in October 2008 when my wife came and told me God is calling us to Italy. "Nobody goes to Italy to do missions."

I honestly know now that these thoughts are what's going on in people's heads when I tell them that in spite of a Catholic Christian tradition that most Italians (95%) don't go to church. That's 57 million out of 60 million people. There's a Catholic church in every one of Italy's 33,500 cities, but somehow instead of turning to their Creator for help and answers about life, many Italians turn to psychics. Yes, Italians spend $8.5 BILLION annually asking a madam for advice instead of the King of Kings.

Yes, this sounds like an indictment, and maybe even a little harsh. But that's the reality of the problem. The numbers are not shared out of anger, but out of compassion. Italians are like most people in the West. We have a heritage of faith from Christendom, but it doesn't work practically into our lives and how we make decisions. Instead of the gospel advancing in Europe and America, the Enlightenment has come full circle and produced well-cultured, well-informed disciples of the post-modern, post-Christian reality that we all share in now.

It's clear to me now that there are indeed 2 Italy's; the one we want to see and is indeed real, and the one that God sees that is even more real. I fought the stereotypes, too, but finally surrendered out of sheer evidence of the paganization of the whole continent of Europe. We can no longer be the kid in the corner with our eyes closed and hands over them saying, "No, it's not real. I don't believe you!" We must accept the fact that we have all been the frog in the pot of water. We have allowed the culture of the world to fool us into thinking that we are all alright.

I understand now why people look at me and my choice to follow God with such perplexity. I can read it in their eyes. Even if they can suspend their version of reality long enough to engage the fact that maybe the Italy I am telling them about really does exist, they can't possibly think that my going there could do anything to make the situation better. Sometimes I think I believe them. It doesn't make sense to me at all that God would call me and my family out of Atlanta, GA to go to Italy and plant churches. I don't have a Bible degree. I don't speak Italian. I don't have any prior experience as a cross-cultural missionary. It would seem God chose the wrong family for the mission.


But ever since I said yes to God in this call it has been an uphill battle to convince people of the legitimacy of who I am and the work that God has called me to do. When I have told some people about how much money it takes to live and work there, I have been asked if I know anyone rich. I simply say "Jesus, He owns everything anyway." Other times I have fought anger internally at the seeming complacency of some people's hearts to join in. I have been reprimanded for my tenacity and told to stop being a missionary martyr; making people feel sorry for me and my suffering.

I'm not even sure what that means anyway, but I have kept moving forward with no apology for my passion. I've had pastor's critique my abilities, my church's commitment to me, etc. Still I press forward. I have grown in this process, and although painful, I am grateful that God has counted me worthy of this call. I am not so angry at people not giving to me, as the general deer in the headlights stare that most people give when anyone challenges them to push outside the norms of the patterns of their lives and make a sacrifice to take the gospel into the dark places of their communities.

I ask myself, "God what are we doing posting pics of our new flat screens, and our recent cruise to the Bahamas, or the new truck we just bought, etc., etc. on Facebook while your work goes undone?!" In the previous century our ancestors burned with passion and sacrificed much to take the gospel with urgency to the ends of the earth. Now we have to bait people with prizes and special events to even get them off their couches and into the church. All the while we are breaking our arms patting ourselves on the back for serving in the soup kitchen or dropping an extra $20 in the plate. When are we going to stop consuming the gospel through buying CD's of the latest trendy CCM artist, downloading MP3's of our pastor's last revelation from God, and stop wasting our lives gorging ourselves on the constant buffet of media placed in front of us? When will we push away from the table of indulgence, and say "Enough is enough!" I wanna live the gospel and not some vicarious idealistic substitute. If you are not in these categories, then there's no indcitment here. However, God may in this moment be holding a mirrior up to us all, and asking us, "Is all this clutter in your heart and mind and life really necessary?"

How did I get to Illinois? I got fed up with myself. I got tired of listening to and not doing the gospel. I got tired of being religious and not godly. I got tired of going through the motions of Christianity, and started taking the Great Commission seriously and personally. I asked the Lord to transform me from the inside out. Along the way the worst of my humanity has come out. I have been like Jonah pitching a fit over the small things, instead of being glad God has used me to advance His kingdom on the earth. I have worried more about my reputation and the perception others have of me than in my obedience to my King. I don't count myself better than anyone else. I have no credentials except an encounter with Jesus that I can never forget that day on October 3, 2008 when he told me to go to Italy. However, I do count myself a herald. A voice crying out to a generation memorized by the Piped Piper's beautiful songs. God is calling to us all, "Wake up sleepers, wake up to the reality of who I am and the work I am doing to renew all of creation including you!"

The funny thing is, I'm sure there are people who think I've been dishonest in my estimation of when we are leaving for the mission field. Even though I've tried to communicate faith and certainty in a time of ambiguity, I have had to continually adjust my time line to fit God's as He has chosen a longer path than we could have ever predicted. Why did I end up in Illinois? Because God said to come here and get prepared. I came to Wheaton College to get Bible and leadership training. Still people have probably thought I have taken a detour and lost my passion or will or vision for Italy.

However, I see it this way. Wheaton, IL has become Midian for me; a place of training and preparation that will prove invaluable once our feet are on Italian soil. Someone wise once told me that being misunderstood is the price we pay as missionaries to take the gospel to the ends of the earth. Well I am learning to be more comfortable with being misunderstood.

It's exhausting to constantly feel the need to defend my honor and integrity. Right now I have decided to just follow the path God has laid out for me to get to Italy and plant churches, and welcome those who want to share in the work. God doesn't need me to be his public relations guy, offering an explanation for every time the plan He has for me seems to take a misguided step.

I am sure some people think I will never actually follow through with this calling. If that is the case I am here to let them know that they have completely underestimated the God who is so powerfully at work in me. I am not smart enough, strong enough, savvy enough, experienced enough to do what God has called me to do, but I am courageous enough to believe God at his word when He said He called foolish people like me to help bring His kingdom on the earth. What drives me? The voice of God, and the picture of empty pews. When will I get to Italy? I'm already there!


 

Tears and Fears

 

Today is the new "Black Friday." Adam Lanza made sure of that today when he murdered 27 people, many of whom were children in a Connecticut elementary school before turning the gun on himself this morning. When things like this happen, we all pause and ask, "Why?" We turn our faces away from our laptops and TV's and iPads just long enough to look up towards heaven and wait for God to answer. We shed a few tears, hug our children tighter and then maybe quizzically ask in a rhetorical fashion, "How?" How is something like this tragedy even possible?

 

 In our effort to find answers we turn outward and look for an external source, causes to the problem. There we find the weapons. Now we have our answer. The guns killed those children and adults. We need tougher laws. Now I'm not arguing that something needs to be changed in this country in regards to gun control. Setting that issue aside for a moment, however, I want to press deeper, because I think the questions "Why?" and "How?" deserve more than just a superficial answer.

 

 The problem with Adam Lanza is our problem, too. His mental and emotional capacity aside, Adam suffers from a far worse condition – his corrupted and sinful nature. Satan found in him the spirit of Judas, a desire to betray all that is good and holy, and exploited it. Why did Adam Lanza snap? How is it possible for him to have conceived of such a violent and hideous plan to snuff out so many lives – Adam was sick, and so are we. Sick with a violent nature towards God. Our hearts are dark and selfish, and in need of some light.

 

God sent light into the world. So when we ask God, “Why and how in regards to this tragedy, God points us to the answer he has already provided in his Son Jesus. John wrote of Jesus in John 1:4-5 (NKJV), “⁴ In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. ⁵ And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. Why did we not understand his coming? Because we loved our sin. It's hard to admit, but we all LOVE our darkness more than we love the light of Jesus. It's easier to keep the light out than let our hideous deeds be exposed against the brilliant purity and radiance of the living God! John wrote later in 3:19-20, “¹⁹ And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. ²⁰For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed.”

 

At the end of the day we all turn away from God and run and hide like Adam and Eve trying to “fix” or “cover” our problems hoping God won’t notice. Our pride keeps us from surrendering fully to him. We don’t want to be faced with the depravity of our own souls apart from God’s intervention. But if we are to be cleansed fully, we must recklessly and unashamedly pour out in confession and admit that the condition of our soul is dark and nothing but darkness apart from God. We need to not just confess individual sins, but come to the realization that as Isaiah said in 53:6, “All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.”

 

Our pride and self-reliance keep us imprisoned by the fetters of our sinful nature. Not many talk about the sin nature anymore. We all want to deal with the outward symptoms, but no one wants to go through spiritual chemo and radiation to eradicate the source of the cancer in our soul. However, only Jesus can heal us! This is the real story of Christmas; the real reason for the Incarnation - why it was necessary for God to become man and die to be risen again. He died not just to forgive us of the individual times we sin; He died to make us new. Completely new! To restore the Imago Dei – the image of God pressed into humanity from the beginning before the Fall. Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “¹⁷ Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” Jesus didn’t come to make us better. NO! Jesus is not our way to a better life. He is the way to NEW life!

 

 When we refuse to admit how dark we really are on the inside, we are only fooling ourselves. We need to stop telling people, “You’re OK, God loves you anyway.” Yes, He loves us the way we are, but He loves us far more than to leave us in that sorry condition. Every day I am reminded that everything inside me, every inclination of my heart wars against God. My flesh pulls me towards destruction, and desires to partner with Satan in wreaking havoc on humanity. However, we must all take seriously the reality of why such an act such as the one that happened in Connecticut today is possible. The image of God in all of us has been corrupted by sin, so as a result our free will has been marred.

 

To complicate matters, there is one who lives to incite a riot of epic proportions in the souls of humanity. He lives to bring death to everyone and everything. Peter reminds us and warns us in 1 Peter 5:8, “⁸ Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.” All Satan needs is a willing vessel to cooperate with him and carry out his plan of destruction. Today he found one in Adam Lanza. All the more reason we must as Proverbs 4:23 (NLT) tells us, “ Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Without the Holy Spirit living in our hearts, our lives are like houses with unlocked doors, ready to fall prey to the whims and desires of the devil.

May the horror of what happened today turn us to God and push us to our knees in repentance. Let the events of “Black Friday” make tomorrow a truly “Sober Saturday.”

No More Silence

 

As I write, I am listening to the song Break Every Chain, by Jesus Culture and the line keeps repeating There is power in the name of Jesus, to break every chain, break every chain, break every chain.... The more I listen, the bolder my heart grows for the calling He has placed on my life as a missionary to the people of Italy.

 

Since October 3, 2008, God has branded me for this purpose. At times, I have fought it, cursed it, run from it, wept in it, shouted for joy in it, and finally embraced it and called it my own. Sometimes I feel like the prophet Jeremiah when he tried to get out of preaching, "But if I say, 'I will not mention his word or speak anymore in his name,' his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot. - Jeremiah 20:9 (NIV)

 

No matter how many times I tried to put this call on someone else’s shoulders and made excuses for why I can't do what God has called me to do, he has kept scooping it up, and placing it on me. I don't run from it anymore. I don't curse it anymore. I wear it like a garment of mourning as I weep for the lost souls in Italy who are yearning to be free from the bonds of unbelief that the enemy has for too long used to keep eyes blinded, ears plugged, hearts hardened, feet bound from running to the truth, and arms and hands tied so they cannot reach out and receive the free gift of life that God longs to give them.

 

But like Jeremiah, I cannot hold it in any longer. I am a dam bulging at the weight of a mighty river ready to surge forth. No longer will I be silent or ashamed of my call. I run with God into the fight, with NO FEAR of the consequences. I have chased all the other false lovers; soul mirages that have left me dry and broken - money, sex, power, complacency, self-indulgence, etc. I am ruined but for Christ. I am good for nothing but to be broken like an alabaster jar at His feet in a life of total sacrifice. Indeed, I am already oozing the sweet perfume of His Spirit. I long for the day that this prophecy is fulfilled in all the earth - Habakkuk 3:2 (NIV) - "Lord, I have heard of your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, Lord. Repeat them in our day, in our time make them known; in wrath remember mercy."

 

However, it seems frequently that when I share about my burning passion and ask others to join in with me, I get the same response that Moses gave to the burning bush - “I will go over and see this strange sight—why the bush does not burn up.” – Exodus 3:3. Why is my passion so strange? Why do people pat me on the back for my courage, and shake their heads in disbelief?

 

Isn’t this a reasonable act of worship – Christianity 101? Romans 12:1 (NIV) says – “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.” Why is total sacrifice strange or noble or admirable? Stop applauding, put down your hands, and run courageously with me into the fray. When God calls out in our generation as he did to Isaiah in 6:8 (NIV) - “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”…..will we not answer him as Isaiah did? “Here am I. Send me!”

 

Maybe your spiritual battlefield is not Italy. Maybe yours is the office where you work, the neighborhood you live in, the school where you take classes, or the community where you shop. We must be compassionate conquerors, as we hold the banner of Jesus high, crushing the enemy under our feet, and taking the liberated captives into the shelter of the wings of an Almighty God who in Luke 61:1-2 and again in Luke 4:18-19 (NIV) declares- “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free.”

 

This is truly the gospel. This is truly Good News! Truly there is power in the name of Jesus, to break every chain. So no more silence. No more fear. No more complacency. God is calling us to action. What will we choose to do? In life you will inevitably burn for something. Why not burn for God?!

Portrait Of Power

I am a man of strength. At 6’ 2”, 220 lbs., not many people question my physical abilities. Gifted with strength and an unusual ability to tolerate pain, even as a child playing sports doctors marveled at the courage I exhibited under the stress of injury that would make most a puddle of tears. Endurance is a gift that helps me go beyond the physical limits of most people.

I am a man of knowledge. A college graduate with an IQ above 130, not many question my cognitive abilities. Gifted with an ability to think on my feet and create solutions faster than most has earned me a reputation in my field of audiovisual technology. When the seconds are ticking off the countdown clock before the curtain goes up and issues are flaring, I’m the guy on the technical delta team that runs in and gets the job done before anyone knows a problem has even occurred. Problem solving is a gift that helps me excel where most others fail under the pressure.

I am a man of passion. A poet of sorts with a command of the pen, not many question my ability to communicate. Gifted with an ability to speak, write and sing, I’ve always had the confidence and ability to sway others’ opinions with a crafting of words or persuasive emotional appeal. Passionate expression is a gift that helps me stand out from the crowd as a leader.

So when God called my family to Italy as missionaries on October 2, 2008, I thought to myself, “OK God, which one of these gifts that you’ve given me will make the most impact in fundraising now and on the Italian people once we arrive in Italy?” After more than 30 years as a believer, I should have known his response already. His answer was the same as it has always been –  ”But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” - 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV). However, I wasn’t ready to give him the correct reply – “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” - 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV). I was a victim of my own pride.

Our culture teaches us and our churches sometimes unintentionally reinforce the message to mask our weaknesses by overcompensating in our strengths. This is image protection in its purest form.  It’s not that we are dishonest with others, but it’s just counter intuitive to gain influence with people and have them instill confidence in you by publicly trumpeting your weaknesses. That’s not a good resume building technique.

However, especially in the last six months since I resigned the staff position I held on the technical team of my church, God has been taking me through a molting process of sorts, helping me understand the difference between self-reliance and God-dependence. Last year our fundraising efforts were producing amazing results, and we had a reserve of cash in the bank to fund our immediate needs for several months. Therefore, when I resigned my job last August, I honestly thought God would be impressed with this noble act of faith and sacrifice and bless us with the rest of our funding in just a few months. Other missionaries just didn’t have the faith, marketing savvy or tenacity that we had. We were going to beat the 2 year Bell Curve for European missions support raising, write a book on our humble success, and publish our findings so others could be inspired by our story! OK, so maybe I am exaggerating a bit about the book idea, but honestly, we thought we had found some secret missions fundraising portal that would propel us past expectations and really prove to everyone that God has His hand on our family.

The reality set in when the money started running out and the funding started to slow down. We started pushing harder, asking more frequently, praying more earnestly, but all the while never really trusting God to come through in a way that we did not expect. I had created only one solution scenario and God was not following my script. Why had God spoken to us to leave our jobs, if He wasn’t going to rain down fire on our altar and show those Baal-ers who was boss?

To be honest my personal embarrassment started to drive my decision making processes more than the Bible and the Holy Spirit. I started to become less God dependent, and started looking for ways to solve these problems on my own. I secretly polished up my resume and posted it on Monster. Not a single hit. I thought, “God, are you kidding me? What was I thinking in August? I put up the public challenge, posted all the billboards about the good vs. evil showdown, but it seems that you are not going to show up at all! Thanks (sarcasm implied), knowing my ego was about to take a huge hit.”

I was able to keep up the faith charade for a few months, but by the time the Christmas holidays hit and nothing had really changed, I literally gave up the vision inside. I had set out for the Promised Land with high hopes and a sprinter’s pace. God had parted our Red Sea, but now we felt lost in the desert. As most marathoners know, if you pick too fast of a pace, you’ll eventually hit “the wall.” I had hit it alright, but kept backing up and hitting it again with the hopes of knocking it down.

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. – Philippians 1:6 (NIV)

God had not forgotten me, or the calling He had placed on my family. He just needed me to change my attitude to come in line with Him.  Now I truly understand the reason He took me through this process. If I am ever going to really fulfill the calling he has placed on me in Italy to reach the lost, disciple and train leaders, plant churches and see them grow from missionary dependent to God dependent, then He needed to get out all of that false hope that is based on self-reliance and replace it with true faith built not on my abilities but firmly on Him.

Recently I read a statement that really put the graduation cap on this whole lesson in humility. I think it sums up the way God wants to communicate the saving message of His Son – “If you want to impact people, don’t talk about your successes; talk about your failures. - John Maxwell, Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. Now I understand what God was trying to communicate in 2 Corinthians 12:9 when Paul wrote, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” God’s power is the portrait, and my weakness is the frame on which it hangs for display. If that’s the case then make me a museum for your glory, Lord for all to see just how great You are!